Stumblor

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Even My Dreams Are Against Me

I had a weird dream the other night. I dreamt that I was Jessica Alba's boyfriend.

"You're a walking contradiction!" She scolded.

"Yeh, I've been meaning to talk to you about that." I said, a look of embarrassment creeping across my face (I imagine that it was creeping, because I couldn't actually see myself.) "You see, I'm technically not your boyfriend. My real name is David Price, and I've been time travelling into your boyfriend's body off and on now for ooo the last 6 months or so. Although I know you don't want to hear this right now, we are very much in love."

Not seeing the obvious long term benefits in the situation I was describing, she immediately screamed and collapsed, which is unfortunately the reaction I'm most used to when discussing my feelings with girls. I'm really looking forward to a time when I can casually drop "Oh by the way I think my associations with the devil may have rendered our child the antichrist" into a conversation with my beloved and have her reply "Oh really well that explains the primeval shrieking at dawn and I guess we should replenish the holy water cupboard" without a second thought. But I guess we all have dreams.

2 comments:

eleanor bloom said...

Dude. Having Jessica Alba in a dream could never be a bad thing, surely!

1. Recently watched Being John Malkovich (again) so the dream makes total sense to me.

2. You discuss your feelings with girlfriends? How wonderful...

3. If a guy said that antichrist thing to me I'd immediately think of all the dough we'd earn touring the talk show circuit. (AND how much I suit the Mia Farrow, Rosemary's Baby hair cut! Win all round really...)

Kath Lockett said...

Well said, Eleanor!
Davey your humour will get you loved/laid/lassoeed - take heart dear boy