Stumblor

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Ahh Theology

Is there anything it can't answer?

My favourite quotes:


  1. If we evolved from monkeys, then how come we can't speak monkey?


    My mum always said I was 1/8 Cherokee, but I knew something wasn't right when I accidentally incinerated the garden shed when attempting to send smoke signals. Furthermore, my name isn't prefixed with 'running' or 'dancing'. It's just Dave sadly.


  2. You got it backwards. Creationism is based upon science, reason and tons of evidence. Evolution is based on the blind acceptance of superstitions and fairy tales.


    Now I'm really confused. Evolution is the one about the chick evolving out of a dude's rib and that other guy evolving water into wine, right?


  3. I can sum it all up in three words: Evolution is a lie


    Sorry, I only got as far as 'Evolution is a'


    and finally...


  4. A missionary I knew watched a bullet headed for him do a RIGHT ANGLE before it got to him.


    Surprising: that missionaries have the ability to see speeding bullets.
    Not surprising: that missionaries are being routinely shot at.




9 comments:

non-Blondie said...

hahahaha
As of this post I'm no longer stalking you at work, because it leads to accidental snorting and makes my boss wonder if I'm working as hard as he thinks...
Also, hi, I've been stalking you (lurking is such a dirty word)

Deep Kick Girl said...

Amen to that!

Jo said...

The only good thing about religion: blaming the bad shit on Satan.

God bless not being accountable.

eleanor bloom said...

Hmm, well, the bullet still 'got to him'.


Synchronistically, I'm reading about Darwin at the mo' in a book about FitzRoy, the captain of the Beagle. They were both in their early 20s at the time! I'm sure I knew this already but it's sunk in this time, I mean, what did I achieve in my early 20s beside an impressive resilience to hangovers?

eleanor bloom said...

Oh, I should add that later FitzRoy became a fundamentalist Christian and believed more in the evidence of the Bible - eg. the flood - than in evolution.

The Blakkat said...

Funny you should mention evolution vs creationism - I working on little post about it now. Seems we're all in agreement, here, though.

The Blakkat said...

Oh & I meant to add - what about Blogging Dave for your Cherokee name? or maybe Drinking Beer Dave?

davey said...

Blondie, what you say is true -- although lurking does have a bwahaha take over the world aspect that is kinda alluring. Glad to have you hiding in the bushes tho. When you feel comfortable, come in I'll make you a cuppa.

Hey Jo, love to do that, but it was part of the contract to make him free of indemnity when I sold him my soul. I did get a bitchin pair of rollerskates out of it though!

Captain of the beagle Blomster? Intriguing. The only captaincy I was able to achieve in my early 20s was captain of the chess club, a two person outfit that was subsequently disbanded after an unfortunate rule dispute. Never heard of Fitzroy though, will investigate.

Blakkat, look forward to not seeing it come up on my blogreader! You know I love you cos of the special effort I have to make. The jury is still out on the Cherokee names, personally I'm after something that references some mythical past achievement.. like...

Perfect circle davey..

or

Narrowly missing jury duty davey..

I'll come up with a good one soon, promise. It's late and sleepy.

Milly Moo said...

how about 'Always punctual and polite Davey' ?
Or Not-lactose Intolerant Davey
Mildly interested in Gardening Davey?

On a more serious note, agree with you entirely re theology. Even at age three I wondered just how in the hell old Noah could have crammed two of everything on his boat and why he bothered with creatures like spiders and mozzies