LOLCets

Overheard on the train back from Brighton:

"You know Mery's cet? Yeh, the fet one. Wull it got run over by a car end lost ets tail. Et must heve bin bed, because now et kearn't crep!"

"Hey?"

"Mery's cet. Et kearn't crep! Et'd do my hid in."


A very tired Cath rose grumpily from my lap, not being able to contest any further with the tales of feline constipation. "Mery's cet is doing a lot of people's hids in today." she explained to me, and at least 3 other people within earshot.

Kiwis. As ubiquitous as Australians, but just a smidgen noisier.

Annual strategy and brainstorming meeting for Doorsigns Inc.

CEO: Well, we've had a pretty prosperous year all things considered. The 'No junk mail' signs have been a big hit, and I think we'd be wise to invest some heavy marketing dollars into the public awareness of them during the first fiscal quarter of this year.

The long term outlook for our 'Beware of the dog' signs have suffered to some degree due to a resurgence in the popularity of cats, but I think that with some broadening of our colour scheme we can safely reclaim some of that allusive market. I hear that cerulean and magenta are hip with the younger 'x-treme' generation, who could be key in this area. Take a note, Brian.



Now I'd like to open the floor to anyone who might have some new ideas for potential signage.



Bob: Personally, I'd like to see some 'No prostitutes here' signs introduced. You know, so that people know not to knock on my door when they're looking for hookers.



CEO: Bob, you've done it again.

Not. Even. Fuckin. Joking.

county coffee

Back in the UK again. This morning we returned to London from visiting a friend in the northern county of Oxfordshire. The place can be pretty much summed up in a conversation I had when trying to get coffee.

me: G'day (trying to sound aussie)

sweet old biddy: 'ello love.

me: Could i grab a latte please?

sob: Sure thing love. Now, do want milk with that?

me: ....

sob: ... ?

me: uuuumm.. naaaah, just the latte. Thanks.


We had a laugh we did. Innit?